World to end Wednesday

Well, not really -- the actual experiments that could result in potentially disastrous "micro black holes" won't happen for another month (and probably won't end anything except the lives of a few protons), but as rumored, CERN's flipping the switch on the four billion dollar Large Hadron Collider this Wednesday to test the superconducting magnets that control the proton beams. After a clockwise test, they'll send protons counter-clockwise, and after that -- smashy time. Of course, there are still paranoid lawsuits pending to shut all this down, and we wouldn't mind another rap video or two, but after two decades of work, it's probably time to boot this thing up, death threats or no. Let's make it a good last month of humanity, people.